Monday, May 25, 2009

Worthy of Sharing this email

I took my Catholic Season of Lent very seriously this year and prayed primarily for the Truth. I already accepted the fact that Jesus was my way, my truth, and my life (and light), but I needed things to become clear as to how that fit into my personal life and place in the world in which I survive in for a time.

I discovered quickly in the first week of Lent that the very last question God will ever have for me is "What denomination were you on earth". Many folks seek to confuse me by saying that we as humans are as ants to God, then without taking a new breath of air quote scripture where God cares for even the sparrow and has the numbers of hairs on our often balding heads numbered, and then right on to the necessity of having a "personal" relationship with a God who is so far above our understanding and knowledge and wisdom we can never see him or even recently told we cannot even name Him. To make matters even worse the same folks share with you that in order to live a life of faith you need to remove all logic, never trust your feelings and senses, and God is in charge of this decaying egg shaped globe we are loaned a short life upon no matter what we experience here with our senses and daily doses of reality.

I was amazed that in about the 3rd week of Lent I realized that life is simply God and choices. If God is that far above my understanding, and senses, and even my imagination, I am wasting too much time and energy and brain cramps to continue this discernment for even one more Easter Season.

I simply have made the choice to trust that Jesus died out of love for me and forgiveness of my sins and doubts and also choose to live among the weeds in the wheat until the harvest is complete.
Exactly how a Virgin can have a child of God, how many people were named Adam and Eve, if an angel can really have free will to become a devil over a jealous attitude where a human is concerned, how God had a male and female of every animal walk into a boat made of wood and pitch and survive the end of the world or part of it and all these other quiz questions, no longer matter to me.
I pray for forgiveness from those I may have insulted or even ignored or were too critical of along my almost 52 year quest and look forward to a life left of old age and grandchildren.
I always considered myself a fighter and Lord knows I have had the temper to compliment that mind set.....now I spend much time in prayer and thanksgiving for my friends and family and gifts of love and faith.....but no longer dream about changing this world in big ways.....it's not mine to change...the world can keep the change...
Keith Landry SFO

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